This has to be one of the hardest things I've had to do

What have you found hard to master for your business?

For me, one of the hardest has been a word. Yep, there is one word it has taken me years to conquer in business. Yet, it’s been perhaps the most powerful word in actually growing my business and keeping me focused on what I want to achieve.

No.

It may sound at odds with the, “say yes to every opportunity” mantra we often hear small biz owners need to practice, but learning to say "no" can honestly be one of the greatest things you’ll ever do. I have worked with hundreds of small biz owners 1:1 in my coaching and there are definitely core themes that come up with everyone, no matter how established or experienced they are. Saying “no” and putting in place boundaries has to be one of the most common.

Why is it such a problem, especially for small business owners?

Because we are conditioned to want to be liked, to please people and to shy away from any sort of confrontation. Further, as business owners, it's not just our own reputation on the line, but the brand's we have built and so we often take the safe option rather than the one that would put our needs first.

When we’re just starting out or really trying to grow our small business, it’s so tempting to say “yes” to every opportunity – every collaboration, every interview, every request for samples, every pick-your-brain meeting, every coffee “catch up” and we live in this constant state of FOMO if we turn anything down. Or, a state where we worry too much about what others might think.

This is perhaps especially true right now as we near the end of 2020 and many of us are having things return to “normal”. There's this sense that we “must” get out and do ALL THE THINGS, say yes to ALL the opportunities. The thing is, by saying “yes” to those things it means we’re really saying “no” to something else.

We’re saying “no” to working on our business, tweaking the business model, updating the website, really reviewing customer feedback, taking the time to understand our analytics so we can decipher which levers add and subtract from our success and/or finally completing that online business course we bought when Covid-19 first hit. We are also potentially saying no to that freedom and time that was a drawcard for starting a business in the first place.

While I’m definitely not saying turn down every chance to meet someone new or collaborate, or even just get out of the house after so many months living with restrictions, I am suggesting that you really consider the following questions when an opportunity or request arises instead of falling into an autopilot “yeah, sure!” then wondering where all of your time has gone.

As Steve Jobs famously said, "Focusing is about saying no".

Here are five quick questions to ask yourself before you instantly accept the next biz offer or request:


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1. Does this align with my business goals? In my workshops and coaching calls, I always ask people to define their top three goals for their business. (You can certainly have more but sticking to three over the course of a year allows you to focus). When an opportunity arises look at your top goals (i.e. $X in sales, launching a new site, hiring two new staff, increasing email lists) and really question if this aligns with those. If it does, go ahead. If it doesn’t, consider why you are agreeing to it (see #5 below).

2. Will something else suffer if I accept this? Way back in early 2016, in. the first few months of starting my business, I would accept calls and reply to emails on a Friday despite that being the day I had dedicated to spend with my son. Over time I realised this quality family time was being put behind calls and emails that were not at all urgent. I had quit full-time work in 2015, partly to spend more time with him, so it didn’t make sense to put something else ahead of that. I now make it known to clients that I don't work Wednesdays of Fridays. In five years, I can honestly say it hasn’t had any negative affect on business and I wish I’d just done it right from the start. Ask yourself, what may suffer if I say yes to this?

3. Is there an alternative option? I am often asked to meet people for coffee and I did so for the first 9 or so months of business. I quickly learned that the initial conversation could just as easily happen over Zoom or phone. This reduced my travel time and any additional costs (parking, meals etc.). It also allowed me to sift any tyre-kickers from the people who actually make things happen. This sounds harsh but if a stranger asked you for $100 you’d ask why, yet when someone asks for our time, for free, we don’t even question it.

4. Have I got the whole picture? By this, I mean has the person contacting you with an opportunity or request, really thought things out; are they coming to you with a clear objective or idea. I’ve worked with clients who get contacted for media opportunities but when they ask more about the feature, the journalist isn’t able to send through an outline, brief or sample questions (things that should be easy to pull together prior to requesting an interview). Likewise, when influencers ask for free items they may not outline when the piece will be published, what reach it should have and how they’ll amplify it on their social/email channels. Don’t be afraid to ask questions of someone prior to making a decision. I use Google Forms or just a plain ol’ Word document. If people can’t be bothered answering these, then you have to question how committed they are to begin with.

5. Why am I doing this? If you have reviewed question #1 and find the opportunity doesn’t specifically align with your business goals, but it's something you still want, then question why else you might do it. It may just be super fun, it may be a creative outlet, it may be the chance to work with a friend or to do something you never ever thought you would (such as public speaking). This is fine as long as you’re aware it won’t necessarily add to your specific business goals (though it may add to your personal development which can be just as important!).

If you’re finding you have too much on your to-do list right now or too many social events you feel obligated to go to, consider what you can start saying “no” to in your life. It may just open up space to say "yes" to something even better in the future.


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