That taboo subject most small biz owners don't discuss enough? Here's what you can do...
Can you believe it’s May already? Only one more month and we’re already halfway through 2021. Wow. Where has it gone?
Given it is the start of May, I wanted to highlight something that’s not talked about much, when it comes to running a small business. I'm definitely not a subject matter expert on it, but I know it's important to talk about, openly.
Now, before I do, I wanted to alert anyone who needs it, that today’s blog is focused on domestic and family violence. If this is a subject you are challenged by my heart goes out to you. It’s also perhaps worth considering if you wish to bypass this blog and look at getting help via 1800 RESPECT (phone 1800 737 732) or visiting a site like Your Toolkit, Safesteps or Our Watch. If you are outside of Australia please visit your local mental health website or even call a friend. You are not alone and there is help available.
If you have listened to my podcast for some time (thank you), you may know that I have worked (both paid and voluntarily) with a range of domestic violence prevention charities and organisations over the last decade. I have, thankfully, never experienced FDV myself but I know that the figures in Australia, where I live, make it one of the most shameful aspects of our country. In Australia, 1 woman is killed every single week by a former or current partner. You only need to switch on the news to see examples of this, often more than once a week. Research also suggests that 1 woman out of every 3 will experience physical or sexual violence, or both, perpetrated by someone they know (with the vast majority of abuse conducted by men); Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander women experience far higher rates and more severe forms of family violence compared to other women. In Australia police attend a call-out about domestic violence situations every two minutes. More than 50% of the women in FDV situations have children in their care.
(Now men are also recipients of domestic violence, however research suggests women (or those identifying as women) are 4-5x more likely to experience it than men; this blog focuses on how it impacts women.)
These are confronting statistics and it’s tempting to throw our hands up and think, “How would I, as a small business owner, even begin to make a difference?”. The fact is you can.
May and October are both months dedicated to domestic violence prevention awareness. These are months in which charities, government groups, not-for-profits and a whole host of other businesses and brands will be doing whatever they can to try and spread the word about preventing domestic and family violence and really seeing equalities lined up between females and males in this country.
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So, what can you, as a small business owner do?
A whole lot. Small businesses employ more than 97% of all employed people in Australia, and equate to more than half of of annual GDP. We have a HUGE amount of power if we all work together.
Here are five ways to help prevent domestic violence as a small business owner:
1. Familiarise yourself with domestic violence leave policies
What is required by law for any small business with employees? What is mandatory? Do you have this in place? What could you add to that to make sure that your employees, particularly female employees, feel supported? Importantly, do your staff know that these policies exist? It’s one thing to have a policy, it's quite another to make sure that everybody in the business knows that this exists.
2. Familiarise yourself with domestic violence prevention national days
These are easily Google-able and can really have an impact, raise awareness and get the conversation happening (rather than staying behind closed doors). This could be as simple as posting something on your social media account. It could be putting something in a newsletter. It could be potentially taking a percentage of a sale that you have in, say, the month of May or October and putting it towards a domestic violence charity or a cause that deals with domestic violence prevention. The more everyone talks about this, the more people experiencing it will feel comfortable in seeking help.
3. Look at the language that is used in your office, your warehouse or wherever it is that you work (even remotely)
What sort of language are you letting slide when it comes to discussions around staff, clients, customers, particularly females or those who identify as women? These could be derogatory comments around other women. It could be comments around people's appearance. I have worked in and consulted to so many companies, and I will often hear people in passing make comments around a women's appearance that they just don’t make about a man’s. Are you enabling bitchiness or gossip to happen? Are you encouraging conversations where women are put down (even celebrities while scrolling IG at work)? One of my fave brands is Melody Ehsani, out of the US. I remember hearing her interviewed and she discussed the zero tolerance of gossip in her workplace: anyone caught gossiping about another employee, customer, client or even celebrity they don’t know is automatically fired on the spot. It may sound harsh, but these things all add up to women not being seen as equal. Start looking at the language that is used in your business. It could be to/from your suppliers, it could be to/from your manufacturers or to/from your staff. Be brave in calling it out and, importantly, be brave in questioning your own use of language that puts women down.
4. Look at your marketing messages
How stereotypical are your marketing images and messages when it comes their portrayal of women? For instance, are you always using a woman in a caregiving role or in the kitchen for your social media images, as opposed to mixing it up and looking at all genders? You may be tempted to think that these things don’t make a difference, but we take in 10,000 marketing messages a day and we can’t tell which 100 of these will stick in people’s subconscious. So much of the research into the prevention of domestic violence suggests that a belief that women are inferior starts in kinder and is is this belief that, later on for some, can cause issues like FDV. Little boys and girls need to see themselves represented in all ways and while you’re scrolling IG in front of kids, or working on the content to show in your next campaign, they are watching and learning and making judgements. (And I know, statistically women do do more of the housework and primary caregiving (you only need to read The Wife Drought for the shocking inequalities that still exist), but nothing changes if nothing changes). It may sound small but if just 20% of small businesses made a concentrated effort to avoid stereotypical gender roles in their marketing, it would have a massive ripple effect to the wider community.
5. Have the hard conversations
While we may be inundated with government-run TV advertising on the issue of domestic violence (at least, here in Australia), we are still shying away from having the conversations about it with our own friendship circles or workplaces. Yet, it’s exactly this that will stop it being such a taboo subject; and allow the women (and men) experiencing it, who often feel immense shame and embarrassment, to open up and know they’re not alone. How you do this is entirely up to you. It could be a staff email that gets circulated. It could be changing up the causes you support and ensuring education is done around those. It could be running a lunch & learn, where you invite in a paid speaker from one of the companies listed above to discuss best practices. It could be committing to changing your policies and openly discussing these at offsite strategy / team bonding days. It could be collaborating or partnering with a domestic violence prevention charity or brand. If you have a work bookclub, it could be working through the harrowing, but important, Jess Hill book, See What You Made Me Do. In my own life, I have had conversations and sent messages and emails to friends, I have brought up the topic in multiple ways and I have worked with numerous clients on all of the above.
Nothing changes if nothing changes. We ALL have a role to play in making sure than the environment our clients, customers, suppliers, friends, family and strangers operate in is one that is safe for all.
Again, if this blog has triggered anything please do reach out for help. In Australia that could be phoning or visiting 1800 RESPECT (phone 1800 737 732) or visiting Your Toolkit, Safesteps or Our Watch. If you are outside of Australia please visit your local mental health website or even call a friend. You are not alone and there is help available.